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8.21.2010

and all of a sudden it occured to me that maybe I was okay after all...

I think I have finally discovered what I want to do. I finally have found my magnetic north and am heading in the right direction. I told someone tonight what my hopes for the future were, someone that I would not normally have told, and they thought it sounded wonderful. I don't think I'm going to tell anyone else, because I just want to see what happens. Besides, I kind of like the reaction that I get from some people when I tell them that I don't really know what I want to do with my life, that I don't really want to work, or have a job that feels like work. It's comical actually, that other people worry more about my future than I do.

God has been helping me this year. Helping me to get to know myself so that I can know what he has given me that I can offer to the world. Helping me to get over my obsession with money. Helping me to gain confidence in my talents. Helping me to get rid of all the darkness that was (and sometimes still is) inside of me and filling it with His light. He's been pretty wonderful. You should thank Him for that. I know I have.

8.04.2010

banishing the roots of despair

Passion keeps us alive.

I was reminded of this as I watched The Dead Poets Society today.

"We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race and the human race is filled with passion. Medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for." --John Keating

During our dark points in life it may be hard for us to remember why we keep going. These are the moments when we lack passion. Many of these moments occur due to the perceived absence of love. But in reality, these things are really all around. I have not felt this despair in a long time now because I have come to know a love that never leaves me wanting. A love comprised of poetry and beauty and romance. A love driven by a passion that has its root deep in the soul. It is this love that I am alive for, and it is the only reason I stay that way.